Estrella

“Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself. But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires: To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night. To know the pain of too much tenderness. To be wounded by your own understanding of love; And to bleed willingly and joyfully. To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving; To rest at the noon hour and meditate love’s ecstasy; To return home at eventide with gratitude; And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.”  Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet (14)

In your aloneness you have watched with our days, and in your wakefulness you have listened to the weeping and the laughter of our sleep. Now therefore disclose us to ourselves, and tell us all that has been shown you of that which is between birth and death.   - Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet (10)

Born and raised in Jerusalem in the second half of the twentieth century could confuse one’s identity. Palestinian versus Israeli. Muslim Arab versus Muslim Israeli. The longest and most fought-over city in the world was the location of the film Miral . Miral was the name for the red flower that grew on the side of the road in Jerusalem. This flower was a witness to lots of the pain and change in the lands of Israel and Palestine like Miral, the film’s protagonist. Image from Google Images Miral was born to a mother who underwent sexual abuse as a child and an imam father who loved her mother despite of her pain and addictions. Miral came of age in an all-girls school. The school was the product of one woman’s desire to help orphaned Palestinian children during the 1948 war. Each subsequent war brought more orphans and more girls. After Miral lost her mother, her father decided to send her to the girls school for her education and well-being because her ...

I have started watching films based on the war motif. I kicked off the war series with Red Tails , a heroic portrait of the Tuskegee Airmen who flew in combat for the U.S. against the Nazis during WWII. Real characters of men came to life as well as the hurt of segregation and racism and the pain of losing men in war. But war is hell, and my second film showed a much more visual and guttural graphic of that saying. In the Land of Blood and Honey was Angelina Jolie’s first directed film, but I know that it won’t be her last. As much as Jolie is embraced and embedded into American Hollywood, her underlying skin breathes for international conflicts, hoping to bring peace to them. In another life, I see her being a diplomat, an activist and a reporter. In this life, her efforts to meet with other distressed people in the developing world in international conflicts has made her all three.   The Bosnian War was noted as “the worst war in European histo...

“To weave was to write, and to write was to be understood.”  These are the key words from Holly Payne’s novel The Virgin’s Knot , which revolves around one woman’s gift to weave and inspire others; yet, she struggles with this gift, hoping it could eventually lead her away to freedom.  It is my desire that my words inspire others as well as free me through expression; something that The Virgin’s Knot Turkish protagonist, Nurdane, could not do. I recently returned from the Middle East, specifically Amman, Jordan, and part of my heart now lies in its deserts and open, rolling hills.  Jordan was not my first destination for a study abroad experience, but I am so glad that I did travel there despite previous reservations and preferences for other countries.  Because of a university scholarship tied to my study abroad experience, I was designated to blog for my school’s study abroad website, and that is how I found my voice through words. Writing has be...

Tomorrow, I will leave Jordan and the Middle East, but insha’Allah (God-willing) - not forever.   I have developed so many friendships and bonds with people from my program as well as with my host family.   Life will not be the same without returning home every day to see my two host sisters’ lovely faces or entering my host family's home to find a large hot bowl of ‘maglooba’ (a Jordanian rice dish with chicken) waiting for me. Although I leave Jordan with many souvenirs, I feel that I am lacking one intangible aspect of my trip that I wish I had better cultivated while here: more relationships with Jordanians.   In the Middle East, it is very hard at times to talk to natives, especially if you are female.   It is a cultural taboo to talk to men other than your relatives, and Jordanian women are usually not as open to talking to foreigners, except the few liberal Jordanian women.   When I do return to Jordan, I hope that I can work or...

It's dusk in Jordan, and the young boys are out in the street with a football, kicking it around.   You catch one as he the moves the ball in and about his feet effortlessly, taunting his opponents to take it from him.   You go up to his father and ask a very important question: "Which is better: Barcelona or Real Madrid?"   He responds, "Barcelona, of course."   This is the language that all common men speak in this country - in this region - in this world when they can't speak any other common language: the international language of football. I live with a host family in which the father is the goalie coach for the number one football team in Jordan: Al-Wehdat.   Football was his childhood and is his adulthood, and it will be his future.   If there is something that brings all men together in the Middle East, it's football.   My host dad is also the head coach for one of the police department divisions in Jordan, so he gets t...

She walks by, and the men on their cigarette break jeer at her.   "Hey beautiful!"   "Hey sexy!" they say.   The hissing sounds made to call cats are now for her.   Yet, she giggles to herself, making the men continue their calls and words out to her.   " ايش عسل " (Iesha assel!) which means "Hey honey!"   She wears skinny jeans, a long sleeved shirt and some makeup – nothing really revealing – even if she does not wear the hejaab (head scarf) .   Another girl is behind her and passes the same men.   The men begin their jeering at her, calling her inappropriate names.   They say her eyes are beautiful, observing that her mascara highlights their color.   What is she wearing?   An all black robe, a hejaab (head scarf) and a nekaab which covers here entire face except her eyes left open to the public.   Different appearances, yet same treatment from the men on the street.   Welcome to the streets of ...

Skin color has another meaning in Jordanian society.   Jordanians identify others by their ethnicity rather than the color of their skin.   When people look at me in Jordan, they think, “She’s American” because of my cultural mannerisms.   But when Jordanians see another dark-skinned person in a servant-like role like hospitality, they assume that the person could either be Sudanese or Ethiopian, whom are both known for their hospitality skills in the Hashemite kingdom.   Even though there are Arabs working in roles like construction, an Egyptian is not the same as a Jordanian.   Actually, Jordanians frown down upon Egyptians because of certain prejudices that Egyptians do not work as hard and are devious.   Yet, Egyptians and Jordanians are both Arabs.   The tension is between ethnicities, not so much skin color. If an American sees a person of color serving those with lighter skin, one may think in this age, “Oh, that’s so pr...

I am currently in the midst of midterms, and I am thankful that I only have two.   Half of my classes are Arabic, one in the formal Arabic and another in the colloquial Arabic, and the other half are two elective classes: one on Islam and the other that focuses on international relations and diplomacy in the Middle East.   Yet, even as I attempt to study, there are several adjustments that I have to make. First, because I am living with a host family, I must re-learn to study in the midst of small children and others’ living spaces.   I grew up in a large family with three siblings, and I had my own desk in the quiet basement where I could do most of my work.   When it came to college, I found that I best studied in the library, where silence was mandatory, or in my room, which was quiet even if I had roommates.   Now, I am in the midst of a one year-old and a four year old who do not quite understand the necessity of silence and non-int...

Honor: it is what holds together tribes in Jordan as well in other parts of the Middle East.   It is also the reason that some kill for.   According to Jordanian journalist Rana Husseini, honor crimes are reasons for male family members to persecute and kill their female relatives for dishonoring their family.   It is in a woman’s virginity and modesty that the family honor lies.   When that specific honor is violated, then the woman’s family believes that the honor is lost. Honor crimes are not particular to any culture or religion.   There are many cases of honor crimes that happen in Arab and Islamic society, which is largely a tribal society tracing back before the time of Islam.   In Jordan, however, approximately 20 honor killings happen annually.   That’s a small number compared to the hundreds of honor crimes that happen in Yemen or in Turkey.   Many of these crimes are not mentioned to the authorities actually bec...

People in the Middle East are concerned about the future of democracy and the economy in this region.   So are Americans, and Jordanians see this.   A main topic in today's news in Jordan is what is the U.S. going to do about the rising tension between Israel and Iran and the escalating conflict in Syria?   Both issues are actually interlinked. Many Jordanians look on as the U.N. does little to intervene in Syria because of Russia and China’s choice to veto certain provisions and actions.   Yet, every day more and more refugees from Syria pour into northern Jordan, and Jordanians become more concerned as the conflict heats up between Israel and Iran, making threats at each other of bombings. Jordan earned the nickname “a rock in a hard place” because of its politalic stability, even in the midst of the Arab Spring, and its regional location between other politically unstable and threatened places.   At this time Jordanians can only s...

Some say that it's okay to be who you are wherever you are.  You shouldn't have to change your identity for the sake of societal pressures.  This expression is a product of Western culture, but the world is changing, and there more circumstances of "tolerance" in places outside Western culture.  What I would like to discuss in this topic is the acceptance of and non-discrimination against people that identify with the term LGBT or lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender in Jordan, particularly Amman.  While some believe that homosexuality does not exist in the Islamic world, it does, and many people are living their lives in an “in-between” life here in Jordan.  They are no instances of "gay bashings" or "violence against gays" because the subject is not talked about in Jordanian society.  Yet, many of those who are gay can continue to live and work without discrimination in Amman as long as they do not openly flaunt or speak on their ...

My CIEE college counterparts consist of students from many U.S. states and a few parts of the world.  Most of us have the same goal of learning Arabic and becoming versed in U.S diplomatic relations with the Middle East.  More than half of the students live in a home-stay residence like mine while the other half live in apartments.  This type of living is like the high school experience where one spends most of his time at school and then returns to his house after school and activities before curfew. Many of my college counterparts in my host country are students ranging from Jordanians to Asians to Europeans and other people from Islamic states.  Although I do not take classes with University of Jordan students, my observations have indicated that they are very academic-focused but also sociable and willing to make new friends. University of Jordan students who are Jordanian seem to be very focused on academics, but their religion and fam...

Welcome to Amman, Jordan.  It's your first day attending classes at the University of Jordan, and your first class begins at 8:30 a.m. sharp.  How do you get there?  By taxi or bus of course! Jordan boasts a handful of transportation methods, but many of them are just come as you please and sometimes uncertain regarding a final destination.  Most of the time one takes the yellow taxis or servis taxis (cheaper taxis) to get directly to one place.  In Amman, street names were recently added, so it's best to say one of the circles or a key monument or building nearby the location you want to go.  For example, when I want to go to the University of Jordan, I don't say "to University street"; I say, "I want to go the University of Jordan to the main gate", and the taxi driver will take you directly there. When it comes to buses, it's a bit trickier.  If you want to go to one of the major malls in Amman, you have to be sure to ride...

Jordan: known for its beautiful Islamic culture, Petra (one of the seven wonders) and much more.   Because Jordan has a desert landscape, it does not have much of water for its country, so all Jordanians have to conserve water.   I didn’t realize how different water conservation in words was compared to in practice.   At The George Washington University, many extracurricular clubs and organizations promote recycling and water conversation.   In Jordan, water conversation equates to taking a shower three to four times a week and receiving a limited water supply for a week at a time. I think the issue of water conversation first came into practice when I learned that I would be taking a shower three to four times a week at my host family’s house.   It was different from then what I was used to.   Yet, studying abroad is not about being comfortable; it’s about adjusting to and learning from a new culture.   When living in the ...

I knew that Amman, Jordan had an estimated 2.5 million population, but I never imagined that I would see the population density on top of one of the many jebels or mountains/hills in Amman.   As we stood upon the Citadel where there are ancient Roman ruins and an old mosque and church, my group and I looked out at the vast other hills with buildings upon buildings.   I had never seen a city so condensed, and this view from the jebel helped me to envision the vastness and prosperous future Jordan. Jordan is growing and developing, but it needs time and infrastructure to complete this growth.   Seeing the mast amounts of residential limestone and clay buildings built right next to each other and nearly on top of each other echoed pictures that I had seen in South American cities.   However, there are not nearly as many shacks and shelters built upon each other in Amman.   The high population density of Amman made me realize the meani...